i got to hold and nurse my baby boy today! YEAH!!! : )
rowan was extubated this morning around 9 am, and by 12:30 pm he was in my arms, nursing just as he has since moments after he was born, eyelids gently sliding closed in ecstasy.
josh slept here with him again last night, and wesley, my stepdad, and i went to chick-fil-a for breakfast at 7:15 am, got here to the hospital at 7:45 am. we went back to see him, and he was quite awake and alert, and coughing on his tube a bit. he clearly wanted it out! his nurse, ashley, let us know she was preparing him for extubation, but hadn't heard from his doctors yet. i partially braced myself for another negative chest x-ray report and another 24-hr delay, but... minutes after the nurse left us, the doctor on shift, dr. sandell (i love her!), came in and said not only would the ENT be around in about 5 mins to perform the extubation, but rowan's chest x-ray showed so much improvement from the night before that they were going to extubate him at his bedside in the PICU instead of taking him to the OR! i was sooooo indescribably relieved, excited, and nervous. next, the ENT, dr. hung, came in, and he and the nurses stood around the bed moving things around and checking different tubes, drips, etc. then, before i could get too nervous about what i was about to witness, the tube was out and rowan was coughing and gagging... and breathing, perfectly, strongly. his little voice was hoarse, just like they warned me it would be, but it wasn't as bad as i'd imagined. josh and i stood on either side of his bed and touched him, stroked his hair and arms, spoke softly to him. he calmed down quickly at our touch and the sound of our voices. i thought i was going to have to ask the nurses to tie my hands behind my back to keep me from grabbing him. it's so involuntary!
so we just spent time with rowan in his room, by his bed, until 12:30 pm when his nurse came in and handed him to me. the feel of his skin on mine was like a deep, cleansing breath after being underwater for too long, or a burst of sunshine on my face after sitting in shadows. it was awkward, cuddling him around the tubes and electrodes, being careful not to tug on his IV or the little oxygen prongs in his nostrils. he's been disconnected from more and more devices as the day has progressed; by 4 am the sedatives and pain meds were gone, at 9 am the breathing tube came out, at 5 pm the oxygen prongs came off, and by 6 or 7 pm the IV fluids and lipids were disconnected. now he is just getting antibiotics and steroids, breathing treatments and CPT every 4 hours, and the little electrodes are still stuck to his chest, of course, monitoring his heart rate, his oxygen saturation level, his blood pressure, and his respiratory rate.
in the first hours after he was extubated, he would cry and tremble when an unfamiliar person would enter the room, because he knew a pinch or a poke or the sting of medicine going into the IV line in his foot was soon to come. he also cried through the first couple of breathing treatments and CPT sessions. but this evening, he is much calmer, much more himself, which is so nice and comforting for me. he fell asleep during the most recent CPT session. : )
now it's late - or early - and i'm here at the hospital with rowan, by myself. josh is at home with micah. she spent today with my sister-in-law, melanie, and mel said she "wasn't herself." i guess that means this deviation from our normal routine is starting to get to her. i hope she is okay tonight, if she wakes up and i'm not there... i miss her.
i just had a strawberry-peach-banana frullati smoothie and a blueberry muffin. my tummy and my heart are happy!
rowan was extubated this morning around 9 am, and by 12:30 pm he was in my arms, nursing just as he has since moments after he was born, eyelids gently sliding closed in ecstasy.
josh slept here with him again last night, and wesley, my stepdad, and i went to chick-fil-a for breakfast at 7:15 am, got here to the hospital at 7:45 am. we went back to see him, and he was quite awake and alert, and coughing on his tube a bit. he clearly wanted it out! his nurse, ashley, let us know she was preparing him for extubation, but hadn't heard from his doctors yet. i partially braced myself for another negative chest x-ray report and another 24-hr delay, but... minutes after the nurse left us, the doctor on shift, dr. sandell (i love her!), came in and said not only would the ENT be around in about 5 mins to perform the extubation, but rowan's chest x-ray showed so much improvement from the night before that they were going to extubate him at his bedside in the PICU instead of taking him to the OR! i was sooooo indescribably relieved, excited, and nervous. next, the ENT, dr. hung, came in, and he and the nurses stood around the bed moving things around and checking different tubes, drips, etc. then, before i could get too nervous about what i was about to witness, the tube was out and rowan was coughing and gagging... and breathing, perfectly, strongly. his little voice was hoarse, just like they warned me it would be, but it wasn't as bad as i'd imagined. josh and i stood on either side of his bed and touched him, stroked his hair and arms, spoke softly to him. he calmed down quickly at our touch and the sound of our voices. i thought i was going to have to ask the nurses to tie my hands behind my back to keep me from grabbing him. it's so involuntary!
so we just spent time with rowan in his room, by his bed, until 12:30 pm when his nurse came in and handed him to me. the feel of his skin on mine was like a deep, cleansing breath after being underwater for too long, or a burst of sunshine on my face after sitting in shadows. it was awkward, cuddling him around the tubes and electrodes, being careful not to tug on his IV or the little oxygen prongs in his nostrils. he's been disconnected from more and more devices as the day has progressed; by 4 am the sedatives and pain meds were gone, at 9 am the breathing tube came out, at 5 pm the oxygen prongs came off, and by 6 or 7 pm the IV fluids and lipids were disconnected. now he is just getting antibiotics and steroids, breathing treatments and CPT every 4 hours, and the little electrodes are still stuck to his chest, of course, monitoring his heart rate, his oxygen saturation level, his blood pressure, and his respiratory rate.
in the first hours after he was extubated, he would cry and tremble when an unfamiliar person would enter the room, because he knew a pinch or a poke or the sting of medicine going into the IV line in his foot was soon to come. he also cried through the first couple of breathing treatments and CPT sessions. but this evening, he is much calmer, much more himself, which is so nice and comforting for me. he fell asleep during the most recent CPT session. : )
now it's late - or early - and i'm here at the hospital with rowan, by myself. josh is at home with micah. she spent today with my sister-in-law, melanie, and mel said she "wasn't herself." i guess that means this deviation from our normal routine is starting to get to her. i hope she is okay tonight, if she wakes up and i'm not there... i miss her.
i just had a strawberry-peach-banana frullati smoothie and a blueberry muffin. my tummy and my heart are happy!
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