i ended up taking micah and lina to the DHS office with me this morning, and my dad stayed at my house with rowan. micah was extremely helpful and cooperative, and lina slept on me in the sling the entire 2 hours. score! i got our EBT card, and now just have to wait for the benefits to actually be transferred to our account. josh and i sat down this afternoon while he was home on his lunch break and worked out a budget for the next 6 months, that will allow us to move on the first of april, pay off some money we owe relatives, and do some much-needed maintenance on his jeep. that is, provided he can get a part-time job, and lina's parents decide to keep me on part-time. at the end of 6 months, we will see if we still need the assistance from the state with groceries. until then, it sure will help, and i will try not to feel like i'm taking advantage of taxpayers' money. i guess that's what it's there for.
i also took micah, rowan and lina to collin creek mall in plano today, so micah could participate in some market research. she got paid a cool $25 to sit in a room with another little boy her age, and fiddle with an empty lighter to see if she could get past the child-safety mechanism. she couldn't, and i had to giggle at the lady conducting the testing as she made the children promise her that if they ever found a real lighter, that they would take it straight to their parents. micah wasn't too keen on participating when we first got there; as most of you know, she does not react well to being thrust into an unfamiliar situation in a brand new place, with people she's never met, in which she has to take any instructions from any adult who is not me, or josh. but after a few minutes she settled in and did what she was asked. the other little boy micah's age just sauntered right past his mother and into the room, and sat down and began coloring. i could tell he was already in preschool, or something. again, i felt that pang of, "am i making micah this way? should i be pushing her harder to do things like this?"
but, hours later, at a pajama party storytime at legacy books in plano with our friends, i watched rowan zoom away from me without hesitation, and weave his way into a swarm of kids, young and older, pouncing left and right on huge, squishy bean bags, reading books and coloring pictures... and my friend pointed out to me the difference in their approaches (micah had taken one look at the crowd of kids listening to the story, and run in the opposite direction to find her dad). and i realized that that is just micah. it's part of her makeup, it's who she's been from the moment she was born. i am not making her insecure and uncomfortable by mothering her the way i do. i am meeting her needs and loving her for who she is, and making sure she knows she is safe and secure in her world.
as we left the market research office at the mall, i talked to micah about listening to other adults, and about doing things with other kids, and teachers. i told her about preschool, and what kids did there, and asked her if she'd like to go. she sighed and said, "no, i just want to be with my mommy." i think my heart was glowing in my chest, like ET : )
i also took micah, rowan and lina to collin creek mall in plano today, so micah could participate in some market research. she got paid a cool $25 to sit in a room with another little boy her age, and fiddle with an empty lighter to see if she could get past the child-safety mechanism. she couldn't, and i had to giggle at the lady conducting the testing as she made the children promise her that if they ever found a real lighter, that they would take it straight to their parents. micah wasn't too keen on participating when we first got there; as most of you know, she does not react well to being thrust into an unfamiliar situation in a brand new place, with people she's never met, in which she has to take any instructions from any adult who is not me, or josh. but after a few minutes she settled in and did what she was asked. the other little boy micah's age just sauntered right past his mother and into the room, and sat down and began coloring. i could tell he was already in preschool, or something. again, i felt that pang of, "am i making micah this way? should i be pushing her harder to do things like this?"
but, hours later, at a pajama party storytime at legacy books in plano with our friends, i watched rowan zoom away from me without hesitation, and weave his way into a swarm of kids, young and older, pouncing left and right on huge, squishy bean bags, reading books and coloring pictures... and my friend pointed out to me the difference in their approaches (micah had taken one look at the crowd of kids listening to the story, and run in the opposite direction to find her dad). and i realized that that is just micah. it's part of her makeup, it's who she's been from the moment she was born. i am not making her insecure and uncomfortable by mothering her the way i do. i am meeting her needs and loving her for who she is, and making sure she knows she is safe and secure in her world.
as we left the market research office at the mall, i talked to micah about listening to other adults, and about doing things with other kids, and teachers. i told her about preschool, and what kids did there, and asked her if she'd like to go. she sighed and said, "no, i just want to be with my mommy." i think my heart was glowing in my chest, like ET : )
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