christmas is fast approaching! my sister is coming into town from austin tonight, one of my sisters-in-law will be in tomorrow from tulsa, OK, and my other sister-in-law will be driving down from wichita falls on christmas day. i absolutely love this time of year, when everyone is together! i love the hustle and bustle, and the fast-paced excitement of shopping, wrapping presents, going to parties and family get-togethers.
i am somewhat depressed about this christmas, though, as josh and i haven't been able to purchase a single present for anyone, not even our own children. getting laid off right before christmas is just about the most miserable thing that can happen to someone who feels the way about christmas that i do. it is the most wonderful, magical, loving, nostalgic holiday to me, and i look forward to celebrating it and to the gifts i want to buy for my loved ones all year long. and to arrive at it completely empty-handed, and in such dire financial circumstances, is really... lousy. we can't even put up our damn tree, because it's locked in our storage unit, for which we cannot afford the bill.
but i have absolutely nothing to complain about... there are millions of people who've never experienced a christmas like i have, who don't have the storybook memories of waking up in the middle of the night to a glittering, sparkling living room adorned with a ornamented, lit fir tree and dozens of beautifully wrapped presents, a train set, milk and homemade cookies for santa by the fire place... and santa himself, tiptoeing and quietly adding a few more special gifts to the pile... i can still see the metallic pink wrapping paper mama and daddy used that year... and my grandfather, at our house at 2 AM, in a white beard and a red suit, giving my sister and brother and me the ultimate gift of childhood: faith. i can still feel the butterflies in my stomach as i watched from the hallway door, not really sure if i still believed in santa, but not really sure who that was in my living room...
the blessing is, my kids won't remember that we weren't able to get them anything this year, and they won't know how sad and incapable it made us feel. they'll have so many more christmases to enjoy, and those christmases will be abundant and joyful.
it's not that i think christmas is all about material goods - it's not! it is about giving and receiving and family and fellowship. i want to start a tradition within my own little family of donating clothes and toys to foster kids or kids in group homes or shelters at christmas time, and of volunteering to serve food at local churches who provide a christmas dinner to the needy and homeless. i want to instill in my children the understanding that as very fortunate members of our society, we have a responsibility to provide and care for those less fotunate.
i am ever so thankful this christmas, even though we're in the dumps money-wise. we are healthy, our beautiful children are healthy and happy, my mom and dad and siblings and grandparents are healthy and happy, my sisters-in-law and their beautiful families are healthy and happy. my wonderful friends and their families are all healthy and happy. what more could i ask for?!
i am somewhat depressed about this christmas, though, as josh and i haven't been able to purchase a single present for anyone, not even our own children. getting laid off right before christmas is just about the most miserable thing that can happen to someone who feels the way about christmas that i do. it is the most wonderful, magical, loving, nostalgic holiday to me, and i look forward to celebrating it and to the gifts i want to buy for my loved ones all year long. and to arrive at it completely empty-handed, and in such dire financial circumstances, is really... lousy. we can't even put up our damn tree, because it's locked in our storage unit, for which we cannot afford the bill.
but i have absolutely nothing to complain about... there are millions of people who've never experienced a christmas like i have, who don't have the storybook memories of waking up in the middle of the night to a glittering, sparkling living room adorned with a ornamented, lit fir tree and dozens of beautifully wrapped presents, a train set, milk and homemade cookies for santa by the fire place... and santa himself, tiptoeing and quietly adding a few more special gifts to the pile... i can still see the metallic pink wrapping paper mama and daddy used that year... and my grandfather, at our house at 2 AM, in a white beard and a red suit, giving my sister and brother and me the ultimate gift of childhood: faith. i can still feel the butterflies in my stomach as i watched from the hallway door, not really sure if i still believed in santa, but not really sure who that was in my living room...
the blessing is, my kids won't remember that we weren't able to get them anything this year, and they won't know how sad and incapable it made us feel. they'll have so many more christmases to enjoy, and those christmases will be abundant and joyful.
it's not that i think christmas is all about material goods - it's not! it is about giving and receiving and family and fellowship. i want to start a tradition within my own little family of donating clothes and toys to foster kids or kids in group homes or shelters at christmas time, and of volunteering to serve food at local churches who provide a christmas dinner to the needy and homeless. i want to instill in my children the understanding that as very fortunate members of our society, we have a responsibility to provide and care for those less fotunate.
i am ever so thankful this christmas, even though we're in the dumps money-wise. we are healthy, our beautiful children are healthy and happy, my mom and dad and siblings and grandparents are healthy and happy, my sisters-in-law and their beautiful families are healthy and happy. my wonderful friends and their families are all healthy and happy. what more could i ask for?!
2 comments:
Oh Hannah, I am so sorry about your husband's job. That really stinks! I will be praying for a job for him. BIG HUG to you!!
i love you, hannah boo. you are everything to me and i know things will get better soon! we do have so many wonderful memories to cherish and i am thankful for each and every one. :) ~ mama
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